I may shock a few people today with this statement, but here it goes, anyway:
There is no “missionary lady” magical formula.
Oh, how I wish there were. I wish in that moment that I knelt at the altar and surrendered my life to “full-time Christian service” (which we should already be doing, but that is a different blog post), that God would bestow on me every externally pleasing gift that every “good missionary lady” should have, but He doesn’t. Or, at least, He didn’t for me.
Let’s be honest here:
All missionary ladies do not play the piano, sing special music, teach children or women with no preparation time, have a house that is always company-ready day or night, nor do they have perpetually perfect children.
No Christian woman does, for that matter. The pressure we put on ourselves (or that we perceive others putting on us) is just plain unrealistic and unhealthy.
And yet, this is another one of those mental battlefields for the truth that Satan loves to engage us on.
Lie Number Two : “I’m not ______ enough.”
Let me be quick to say that every Christian woman the world over struggles with this lie. We know in our hearts that we are not perfect and can never be, but inside of us we hope that someone, somewhere is. That gives me the hope that maybe somewhere down the line, I will be ____ enough. Maybe reading my Bible or praying more or being more sacrificial or taking lessons or doing some action on my part will make me _____ enough.
My mind frantically looks around for someone who is ____ enough.
Where do we look most often? The leading ladies in our churches and those women who are held in esteem in our midst. Including that mystical creature known as the “missionary lady.”
Let’s face it: most people’s experience with missionary ladies come from brief encounters in church meetings. The missionary wife or single lady looks put together on the outside. She talks in highly compact and copiously edited sound bites of her exotic experiences on the field. Many times, the missionary lady sings beautifully or accompanies her family on the piano. She shares her delightful experiences with grace and humor as she creatively teaches ladies or children. Her children (if she has the prerequisite three or more) are seemingly well-groomed and sit more or less patiently in church.
Ladies who have grown up in church with this external perfection drummed into their heads and later become missionaries themselves have a hard time reconciling their messy day-to-day lives with the flawless missionary model they have constructed. Difficult living conditions make even basic personal care challenging. Her daily routines would make the average American church-goer gasp if they knew what was going on behind the scenes. Her teaching is invested not in public displays in front of church congregations but behind closed doors as she homeschools her often unwilling children. The grace and humor she displayed in churches can quickly give way to frustration and complaining if she is not carefully guarding her heart.
The door has been left wide open for Satan’s destructive whispers: “What are you doing here? Who do you think you are? How did you ever think that you could do this? You will never be ____ enough. You might as well quit and return back to the U.S. and let someone who is more qualified carry on. ¨
I know that we already know this, but it bears repeating anyway: You are not ____ enough. And God never called you to be. Instead, He patiently reminds us that He is enough.
“I am not spiritual enough.” God did not save us because we were spiritual enough. He saved us because we could not save ourselves and were completely dependent on His grace and mercy. So then, after we are saved, why do we think that we must have a spiritual sufficiency that does not take in consideration His grace in our own sinfulness?
We are not called to do anything without God. It is His Spirit living in us that enables us to do anything for Him. We should not live as slaves to sin, as Romans 6:11-14 reminds us that we are dead to sin. However, we will never be spiritual enough to do anything for God in ourselves. He alone can work through us to do any good work for Him. “Not that we are sufficient of ourselves to think any thing as of ourselves; but our sufficiency is of God; Who also hath made us able ministers of the new testament; not of the letter, but of the spirit: for the letter killeth, but the spirit giveth life.” (2 Corinthians 3:5-6)
“I am not talented enough.” When we begin to compare ourselves or our ministry with others, this lie comes to the forefront. We know that God has not called us to do everything in the same way, but couldn’t we be just a little more like ____ who does everything perfectly? Or maybe we have a heart for a certain ministry but find our talents or skills lacking?
I often find myself returning to Exodus 35 when God was preparing the new tabernacle for His service. God specifically chose Betsaleel and Oholiab to do a specific work and then equipped them to do it. Moses had his job, Aaron had his job, and Betsaleel and Oholiab had their jobs. Each one of them was especially endowed by God to do their service for Him. What an amazing work that was completed when each one surrendered himself to the task that God had equipped him for! What an amazing work we can do when we invest our talents for the Lord.
“I am not smart enough.” Learning a language is not for the faint of heart. Navigating daily life in a foreign country reminds us daily how “dumb” we are. Maybe we lack formal Bible training and feel inadequate to penetrate through years of false teaching to share God’s Word. Or have never been equipped to counsel people though difficult pitfalls in their lives. All of this reminds us that we are not clever enough, but that’s okay. Humbling, but okay.
When I am tempted with this lie, I often turn to Exodus 3 and 4 and remember God’s encounter with Moses in the burning bush. Every one of Moses’s objections ended with the Lord reminding Moses who He is. Of His presence. Of His power. Of His love. He reminds Moses in verse three of chapter three, “I will be with you.” God doesn’t say, “You got this, Moses.” God reminds Him that He “has this,” and that is enough.
“I am not strong enough.” Nothing prepares a person for arriving on the mission field and really seeing the need firsthand. We feel overwhelmed. Outnumbered. Completely inadequate when facing the insurmountable needs all around us. Add to that the pressures we face when difficulties press us on the home front, when tragedy strikes our loved ones thousands of miles away and we are “stuck” here, helpless and unable to provide that physical support to our family and loved ones in the distance. Our defenses crack and we realized how woefully weak we are for the challenges that face us.
How many times I have been encouraged by Paul’s words in 2 Corinthians 12:9-10. Read them once again and remember God’s abundant strength in our weaknesses:
“And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me. Therefore I take pleasure in infirmities, in reproaches, in necessities, in persecutions, in distresses for Christ's sake: for when I am weak, then am I strong.”
The fact is, none of us is ever enough to do anything that God has called us to do. That is the miracle of His grace. In His unfailing love, God takes frail, unworthy creatures, saves us from our sins, and equips us through His Son to do His work through us. That is His grace, His amazing love in action in us and through us.
The next time that we are tempted to meditate this lie from Satan, let’s agree with Him. Yes, we are not enough. But we are not supposed to be. And then let us pray to the One who is sufficient in all things, for His strength to do what He has called us to do.
“And the very God of peace sanctify you wholly; and I pray God your whole spirit and soul and body be preserved blameless unto the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ. Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.” (I Thessalonians 5:23-24).
Missed Part 1? Click here.
A wonderful, heart felt teaching. Thank you for sharing your heart with us. I believe many of us can gain from what you've shared. God bless.
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