A Marriage Masterpiece

A marriage masterpiece is one that is not merely about the husband and wife, it is about glorifying the Lord Jesus Christ (Eph.5:21-33, especially vs.27, 31-32) Outside of your relationship with God, your relationship with your husband is the most important in life. So, your marriage is your life’s work, and, if you want it to be a masterpiece, something beautiful and Christ-honouring, then you have to realise that it will take a lot of hard work and a lot of time. People who have happiness and longevity in marriage don’t have them because they are lucky; it’s because they work hard and invest time.

Michaelangelo took 4 years to paint the Sistine Chapel. Millions of people every year visit the Vatican so they can admire this amazing artwork, and they marvel at the great talent that produced it. Yes, Michaelangelo had talent in spades, but look what he said about his work: “If people knew how hard I worked to get my mastery, it wouldn’t seem so wonderful at all.” Likewise, if you want to have a marriage masterpiece, you will need more than a lucky talent—you will need to put in a lot of time and effort in becoming a master of the art of being married.

Let’s imagine that creating a marriage masterpiece is like painting on a canvas. I did some research about how to paint with acrylics on canvas. By God’s grace I hope we can all learn to paint our marriage canvases the right way so that they become marriage masterpieces.



Step 1: Set up your supplies

You will need your canvas, easel, pallet, paints, brushes, etc. Your painting experience will be so much more relaxing and enjoyable if you prepare ahead of time.

When creating your marriage masterpiece, make sure you have prepared beforehand. Make sure you have the tools you will need (and don’t forget to use them!)—prayer, your pastor, your parents and other godly couples who have good marriages, from whom you can get godly counsel and advice. (Pro 11:14) Where no counsel is, the people fall: but in the multitude of counsellors there is safety. Remember, you don’t have to wait until trouble comes to get advice. A wise person seeks counsel early, to avoid trouble.



Step 2: Choose the right brushes

Most classically-trained artists prefer to use a long-handled brush, because it enables them to paint standing up and from a distance, giving them a good perspective of their artwork.

When you’re painting your marriage masterpiece, remember often to stand back a bit and objectively evaluate your relationship—see what is good and what you need to work on. Make the necessary adjustments. Appreciate all of your husband’s strengths. His weaknesses... look at them from the perspective of eternity. (2 Co 4:18) While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal. And remember: love covers a multitude of sins (I Pet.4:8).



Step 3: Prep your canvas

An artist can choose either a pre-stretched, or a rolled canvas. Pre-stretched canvases are more convenient, but rolled canvases are generally of better quality.

Be prepared that if you want to have a marriage masterpiece of utmost quality that glorifies Christ, God is going to want to do His own stretching. No cheap pre-stretched canvases for Him! There are going to be a lot of trials, some that will require you to really stretch your faith. Don’t shy away from them, but rather endure them patiently, because these will make the canvas of your marriage masterpiece all the more precious and beautiful. (James 1:2-4) My brethren, count it all joy when ye fall into divers temptations; Knowing this, that the trying of your faith worketh patience. But let patience have her perfect work, that ye may be perfect and entire, wanting nothing. (Job 23:10) But he knoweth the way that I take: when he hath tried me, I shall come forth as gold.



An artist will also usually prepare her canvas by applying a primer, which helps the paint go on smoothly and protects the fibres of the canvas as well as the brushes.

The primer or base coat for a marriage masterpiece is your relationship with your Saviour, Jesus Christ. Make sure that you are walking closely and in submission to Him and His Word, because if you can’t submit to Christ, the perfect man and leader, you will never be able to submit to an imperfect man and leader. (Col 2:6) As ye have therefore received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk ye in him:



Step 4: Test colours. Sometimes they dry darker

Remember when painting your own marriage masterpiece that things aren’t always what they seem. Choose to always believe the best about your husband, and even if he messes up, choose to believe he was well-intentioned. Remember that charity (love) believeth all things (I Cor.13:7).



Step 5: Apply background colour to set the mood

Classically-trained artists apply the background before they paint the subject.

In a Christ-honouring marriage, the couple must paint the first layer of colour on their canvas to set the mood for their entire marriage relationship. Make sure that on top of your primer (your relationship with Christ), your foundation colour is His Word and active involvement in the ministries of your church, serving the Lord together. Make the decision as husband and wife early in your marriage (but better late than never if you haven’t already done so!) that as for me and my house, we will serve the Lord (Josh.24:15).



Step 6: Create an underpainting

This is when the artist sketches or faintly paints on the canvas a basic outline of what she intends to paint.

Similarly, when painting your marriage masterpiece, you should have some idea of what you want your marriage to look like; you should have plans and goals that you want to aim for together—goals that you have prayed about and gotten from the Lord. (Pro 19:21) There are many devices in a man's heart; nevertheless the counsel of the LORD, that shall stand.



Step 7: Add a medium

Many artists add a medium to their paint: gel, sand, glitter, beads, etc., in order to add texture, light or interest to their work.

When you’re painting your marriage masterpiece, don’t forget to „spice things up” a bit every now and then. Make sure you do fun things together, and when you’re not together, do things yourself that will keep your husband interested. Take care of your appearance (the Proverbs 31 woman dressed in tapestry), flirt with him (see the woman in Song of Solomon)—but not only that—be an interesting person to talk to. Contrary to what the world would have you believe, not all men are superficial, so don’t just be pretty...be interesting! Continually learn new things, read about a wide range of subjects so that you will keep his interest alive when you talk.





Step 8: Have a safe space for your canvas to dry

An acrylic painting is done in stages: first the background and then usually several layers of colour are added on top, giving the painting texture and depth. Each layer has to completely dry before the next layer is added, so you need a safe place to dry it, where it won’t be touched or damaged by others.

Your marriage masterpiece needs to be protected from the enemy, Satan, who wants to destry it so that it no longer glorifies Christ. Guard your marriage—set boundaries about how each of you interact with people of the opposite sex. Do your utmost to, by the grace of God, fulfil each other’s physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual needs. (1Co 7:3) Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband.



Every artist, until she has finished her masterpiece, will keep it covered. Rarely will an artist reveal to others what she has painted before it is complete. But when it is done, it is hung in a gallery, and before a crowd of art lovers it is unveiled and put on exhibition.

One day, when you go to stand before the Lord at the judgment seat of Christ, your life’s work—your marriage—will be revealed to all. My prayer is that on that day, when the cover is taken off your painting and your life’s work is unveiled, what will be seen will be a masterpiece.

 Written by Suzy Crocket, missionary wife in Romania