Finding a Place in Ministry {A Post for Single Missionaries}

Finding A Place In Ministry
By Deana Hewston

I have to say most, if not all, of us single ladies have heard it before. “You aren’t a missionary.” “You can’t be a single missionary." “You are only a missionary helper.” I have heard these, plus more. As I was on deputation, and being told these things, I began to think and wonder if what I was being told was true. Can I be a missionary whilst being single? Am I out of God’s will to try to go to the mission field without having a spouse? I am very thankful for a sending church and pastor who does support me and my call into missions, but not everyone has that positive support behind them. 

What does the Bible say about these things? Titus 2:4-5 states, “That they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children, to be discreet, chaste, keepers at home, good, obedient to their own husbands, that the word of God be not blasphemed.” As a lady, I understand that God has a specific role for me to play especially, God willing, as a wife one day. But my role in the home and one day as a wife does not exclude ministry. Acts 1:14: “These all continued with one accord in prayer and supplication, with the women, and Mary the mother of Jesus, and with his brethren.” Women do play a part in ministry, even those of us who are single.  I Corinthians 7:34 says, “There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband.” This is not in any way putting down married ladies, but it is reminding us that we, as single ladies, have a roll and a place to “care for the things of the Lord.” If God has put you in the position as a single lady and has called you into the ministry, don’t be ashamed or afraid. “Faithful is he that calleth you, who also will do it.” (I Thessalonians 5:24)

Whenever I came across someone with a negative view on single lady missionaries, I did not get into a discussion. I thanked them for their time and moved on. Sometimes it’s hard when you are speaking to someone in person, but that’s when God’s grace comes into play. Be kind and caring. Don’t develop a reputation for arguments. Let’s not forget our place of submission and deference to God’s Word, but let’s also not forget that God uses his children regardless of their marital status!

Please meet Deana Hewston, she will be contributing to our blog once a month.

Next month we'll read about her first month on the mission field.

About Me

  

                It’s amazing to me how God works in our lives! When I was born, the doctors found that my heart was flipped on the wrong side. To any normal human being, that could be a death sentence or a life full of surgery after surgery. My parents brought this issue before God and the people at their church. Soon after that, there was another doctor visit to follow up on the heart issue, and sure enough, somehow that heart flipped back to its proper place!

                I don’t believe it was a fluke or a chance happening. I truly believe God had and still has a purpose in keeping me alive and healthy! At the age of 8, I realized that I was a sinner in need of a Saviour. I asked God to forgive my sins and save me. I was very aware that the next step was to follow the Lord in Believer’s Baptism. My extreme fear of water kept me from doing that, however! Finally as an 8^th grader, I could no longer withstand the prompting and prodding of the Holy Spirit and surrendered my heart to God. Praise the Lord that was the same year in which I knew God wanted me to be a missionary. I did not know where or when but knew the path to take to get there. I sometimes wonder, if I had surrendered my fear earlier in life, would I have known God’s will for my life a little earlier?

                I attended a local Christian university and graduated with an Associate Degree in Missionary Preparation. Within a year of graduating, God led me to move back to my hometown of Tucson, Arizona. After a time, God asked me to move again, and this time it was to Cottonwood and there I settled in and became a member of Faith Baptist Church. This was the first time I really got involved heavily in church and enjoyed the opportunities of teaching, running the nursery, singing, and such. This was also the time I knew God wanted me to finally take the next step in my goal to become a missionary.

                Through God’s leading, I visited Aberdeen, Scotland in 2007 for two weeks. Upon returning to the States, I knew God showed me where it was he wanted me to work! Through the next 4 years, God lead me back to Tucson and has had me involved with Sonrise Baptist, my sending church.  In September of 2015 I moved to the field of Scotland to begin helping Russell and Janet Brinkley at Bible Baptist Church Perth.

Thankfulness

(Photo Source - Google Images)

As we approach the Thanksgiving season, it has taken on a new meaning for me this year. Being on the field has been an awesome experience for me!

A couple of verses that our youth pastor uses quite frequently are very special to me also. I Thessalonians 5:16-18: "Rejoice evermore. Pray without ceasing. In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."

What do these verses mean to me? In everything, including the struggles and trials and homesickness and anything else that might happen in my life, I am to rejoice and give thanks. :-) This is not always easy! However, if I am in the state of prayer at all times, the Lord is going to give me the grace to be thankful no matter what happens. As I look back over some of the difficult and hard things that have happened in the last few weeks and months, I cannot be discouraged. I am even more thankful that the Lord has protected me in some very tough situations.

What does the word "thankful" mean? According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, the first and third definitions of "thankful" are as follows: 1) conscious of benefit received and 3) well pleased.

Therefore, we need to be conscious that God has given us so many benefits. As single missionaries, we are given even more benefits than married ladies. We have the opportunity to reach out in our ministries in so many different ways. Are you thankful for what God has given you in your ministry? Are you thankful for the obstacles God has placed in your life? Should we be thankful only for the month of November while approaching the Thanksgiving season? Of course not!!! What does verse 18 of our text say? "In EVERY THING give thanks." This means to be thankful 365 days of the year, 12 months of the year, 52 weeks of the year, 24 hours a day, 60 minutes an hour, 60 seconds a minutes, and so on!!!!

What are you thankful for?

Written by Keren Burdick
She is a single missionary, serving the Lord in Honduras.

You can find here website here.

How to Pray for the Single Missionary Woman

1. Pray for our relationship with God.
He is quite literally our all in all: our Confidante, our Best Friend, our Companion, our Protector; if something is not right in our relationship with Him, everything in life is out balance, and life can be quite unbearable. Pray that our work for Him does not distract us from our relationship with Him.

2. Pray for our relationship with other missionaries.
Pray that we can be submissive. Pray that we get along with the other missionaries. Pray that we don't "wear out our welcome" with the other missionaries.

3. Pray for our ministry.
Pray for souls to be saved. Pray for lives to be changed. Pray for doors to be open. Pray for God to use us according to His will.

4. Pray for our health.
Something as small as the flu can keep us from being able to do what God has sent us to do. Also, not having anyone around to help care for us when we're very sick can be quite difficult. More serious health issues could cause us to have to leave the field for medical treatment. Pray that we stay healthy.

5. Pray for our finances.
Many missionaries are struggling financially. Churches in America are struggling, and in turn, they must drop their missionaries' financial support. Most missionaries are unable to work to bring in extra income. This adds stress to lives.

6. Pray that we do not get homesick or lonely.
Lack of friends who understand us and lack of family nearby can be particularly difficult for us. Loneliness (especially in the first year on the field) can be unbearable at times. Pray that God brings us good Christian friends and that He keeps us from getting lonely.

7. Pray that we do not get discouraged.
-When we are discouraged, there often is no one there to "sharpen our iron" (Proverbs 27:17). Pray that we will be encouraged in the Lord and not get discouraged when things don't go as smoothly as we expect (since they almost never do on the mission field). As a side note to that, letters and packages from home always encourage us. Take a few minutes to write us, to remind us that we're not forgotten. Even a short email will bring a smile to our faces. (Also, birthdays and holidays on the field can be some of the most discouraging times for us. Pray especially hard then).

8. Pray for our safety on the field.
Pray for God to be our Protector. We all take all the precautions we can, but we cannot live in a bubble. There are risks and dangers as a single lady in a foreign country. Pray that God protects us and that Satan will not have power to harm us.

9. Pray for our reputation/interaction with single native men.
It is quite easy to make a cultural blunder in interacting with members of the opposite sex in a foreign country. Pray that we do not unwittingly cause damage to our testimony or the work of Christ through something we inadvertently do that might be offensive or improper in our host culture.

10. Pray for people to be willing to help us with small things.
Most of us don't know how to fix cars, build houses, or fix plumbing. Pray that God will bring along people who can help us when we have problems we can't fix ourselves.

11. Pray for us as we travel.
Flying alone can be particularly difficult for some of us. Navigating a foreign airport, rushing to make a connection, or trying to find the right bus to the hotel can be quite frustrating when you're by yourself. Also while traveling on deputation or furlough, we often have to make long drives on our own; we have no one to take over when we get tired; we have no one to talk to us to keep us awake. We don't have a co-pilot to navigate.

12. Pray for our language abilities.
Language barriers can be very difficult. Please pray for us as we learn the language. Pray for clarity of thought and understanding. Even after "we've learned the language," pray that we can communicate clearly and effectively.



This post was written by Jenn Scarfi.  She is a single missionary lady serving the Lord in Vanuatu.  You can read her blog:  InTheirOwnLanguage.

God takes care of His girls

Singleness

By:  Lisa Newland

Missionary serving in Tanzania

When I was a girl the dread of my heart (and I imagine still the dread of most Christian teen gals) is that God would call me to be a missionary in Africa - single. I even avoided praying about it. I figured if being a missionary was in His plans (and heaven forbid, single!) then HE would have to broach the topic.

Well, here I am, 34 yrs old. You guessed it… single missionary in Africa. I imagine God saw the humor in this much earlier than I did; probably when I was still a “tween” trying to avoid the topic of discussion. What I love to recall though is just how God brought me to this place and how God daily sustains me.

A few lessons I was taught as a teenager:  God is all good, all the time. If you believe this, you’ll be willing to surrender all control of your life over to Him. And:  You don’t have to be afraid of His will for your life. He’ll never call you to do something you can’t stand.  Guaranteed… He purposely designed you for whatever His will is for you. Guaranteed… you’ll love it! Now, knowing that I’m right smack dab where God wants me to be… single missionary, in Africa… I can say whole-heartedly… “I AGREE!”

But let me go back...  Growing up I was the shy girl who hid behind her mama’s skirts, too afraid to talk to grown ups. I had two hilarious brothers so I didn’t have to talk much anyway. When asked in youth group, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” My reply, “A wife and mother.” I truly had no other ambitions. No careers sounded appealing. I wasn’t even sure I wanted to go to college.  Bottom line:  I don’t fit the stereotypical strong and independent single woman.

Even more reason for God to call me where I am, I guess. Is not His strength made perfect in our weakness? The part I most love about being here, in the center of God’s will, is that I’m growing, constantly being stretched in my faith, constantly being challenged to trust and love Him more. When I started down this journey of being a single missionary, a dear friend and fellow single missionary, said to me, “Don’t forget, Lisa, God takes care of His girls. He’ll never leave us, and I think He especially looks out for us singles because we don’t have a husband to help keep us in line!” I've been in Africa three years now and can boast confidently, God DOES take care of His girls!

This Saturday I traveled out to a village (45 min away) to lead girls youth group. The clouds looked rather foreboding but Happiness, the pastor’s wife, and I forged ahead. When we turned off the paved road, we saw that rain had already dumped bucket-loads.  The sky was clearing up nicely the closer we got, but the road was a muddy mess. We slipped and slid along. Some puddles were so deep I was worried for my brakes and almost turned back. This past month I’ve been teaching in preschool Bible class that “Bwana ndiye msaada wangu, sitaogopa.” The Lord is my help, I will not be afraid. The lesson on Jesus calming the storm and Jesus’ rebuke to Peter, “Oh, you of little faith,” really touched my heart.  I want to LEARN this lesson. I don’t want to continually need to be rebuked by my Lord. So, before the big puddles I quoted out loud, “Bwana ndiye msaada wangu, sitaogopa.” And before the especially messy, muddy sections of road (that if I slip, how will I ever get out, Lord?), “Bwana ndiye msaada wangu, sitaogopa.” We ended up having a great time with the girls, made it home that night safe and sound with nothing more than a filthy car. God takes care of His girls!

A few years ago I was driving behind a big truck, full of glass soda bottles. The truck drove up and down off a large speed bump (more of a 4 ft wide, 1 ft high walkway across the road). Just as the truck was starting its ascent I had a thought, “You know, it might be safer if I don’t follow quite so close to such a big truck, who knows what could happen.” I put on the brakes to get some distance and just then the truck bounced off the speed bump. The back door flew open and two crates of soda bottles shattered on top of the speed bump. If I hadn’t slowed down those crates would have gone right through my windshield! The Holy Spirit whispered in my ear just in time. God takes care of His girls.

Here in Mwanza, the Lord has surrounded me with a good network of “wazungu” (white people) friends. He’s given me a great house to rent in a very safe compound.  He’s provided a great vehicle at a very reasonable price. I’m doing what I absolutely love, teaching kids. I have many Tanzanian friends at the various village churches I work in. The other day I told the Lord, “You know if all my extended family would just move here to Mwanza my life would be perfect!” OK, sorry… sometimes I can be a bit too sappily (is that a word?) optimistic. I get it from my Grandma. Life isn’t always perfect. There’s days I fight discouragement and despair. Days I long to escape and have no place to go. Days I wish I could just crawl in bed and start over. And even in those days. Days that I don’t feel His presence, I know that God takes care of His girls.

I know I have much still to learn. I’m a recipient of God’s DAILY grace, and it is because of His grace that I KNOW God will take care of me, no matter where He leads.

How about you? Avoiding certain topics in your prayer time?  Afraid of what God might call you to do? Guaranteed… He purposely designed you for whatever His will is for you.  Guaranteed… you’ll love it! Stop avoiding! Plunge in! Just wait and see how God will take care of you!